I am getting really good at shirking my duties. I keep writing way too many posts about my longing to have time to create. I guess if I have the time to blog about not having enough time to create, then I have enough time to create. I vow to record a song before my next blog post.
Run for cover! There are rumblings. The rumblings seem to be less frequent these days, but they persist nonetheless. Yes, the volcano is getting ready to blow again. But alas, have no fear, for this is not a sexual metaphor. It is a musical metaphor!
In previous posts, I have touched on the recent infrequency of my writing, playing and recording. This is due to many factors. First and foremost, I am getting older and the responsibilities of adulthood are weighing heavily on me. We are in a down economy and my financial responsibilities continue to mount and are more difficult to meet. As I focus more on work, there is less time for creative endeavors.
I have learned over the years that I have to make time for music and songs to manifest themselves. As of late, I have not been making that time. But invariably there comes a point, whether or not I am making the time, when something has got to give. The music has to find a way to escape. These days, rather than expecting some epic pyroclastic flow of creative energy, I’ll settle for the slightest seepage of gas from the narrowest of fissures. OK, enough with the volcano metaphors.
Last night my wife and I discussed our yearnings to have more time to create. I cannot begin to express how much pleasure I get out of writing, playing, and recording a song. I love the process of editing words. I love the process of putting music to those words. Ands I love the process of recording that song. And when the song is finally recorded, I love driving aimlessly through town as I listen to it in my car.
So the goal is to make time. I simply do not have the discipline at the end of a full day of work followed by a full evening with the kids to just hop on down to the music studio and jump headlong into the creative process. By then I am totally exhausted and what I really want to do is take part in a brainless activity like drinking a beer and eating popcorn while streaming an episode of The Office.
So my goal is to eke out some creative time in the next six months that allows me to, um, create. I want to do it in the morning, when I am buzzing on coffee and the energy of a new day is coursing through me, and I want to be able to carry that energy and focus into the afternoon. Ideally, I want to do it continuously for a few days, or maybe a week. My dream is to be able to abscond for 7 days to a house somewhere along the Northern California coast, where I can hole up with my instruments and recording devices and go to town. I’d step out for the occasional walk among pampas grass, gray skies, and cool Pacific breezes. There would be no other priorities. That, to me, is Heaven. Or it could be hell. I’m determined to find out which it is.
My two boys are 3 and 4. It was not until recently that they expressed any desire for me to play guitar for them. Now we have a great routine; At the end of the day, Melanie reads them books in bed for 1/2 hour or so and then I am called in to play a few songs on the guitar. Melanie calls me the closer. She does all the heavy lifting, pitching 8 1/3 solid innings, and all I have to do is get 2 outs. It’s a great gig.
I typically play the same few songs because the boys get comfortable with them and don’t want to change the routine. Sun Valley Sally is first, then Peru, then I Won’t Curse the Sunrise. It is really cool to be able to finish the night playing guitar to the boys. And since my wife is a voracious reader, she thinks it is really cool to be able to finish the night reading to them. It is a lovely ritual that we are enjoying greatly, but which will surely come to an end at some point. Sigh.